On fluff, psych books, and a mish-mosh of motivation | Contentsation 004

1 Article: In defense of “self-help”

In defense of “self-help” | me

I used to be a self-help hater. The “fluff” gets a bad rep. But it’s actually really useful.

In this article, I talk about the realization I had that changed my perspective on self-help books and the fluff. I also include a list of my top book recs.

Enjoy :)

2 IG posts

Unhappiness + Unfulfillment Vs. Fear | me

Feeling like you have unlimited potential but not creating anything —> unhappiness

Getting paid for a job when you know you’re meant to be doing something else —> unfulfillment

You’re in a dark place.

What’s holding you back?

Fear.

Fear of rejection.

Fear of judgment.

Fear of your own power.

If you’re going through this, it’s okay.

The dark times are necessary.

The way out?

Your level of unhappiness and unfulfillment need to outweigh your fear.

The greatest artists, entrepreneurs, musicians, and writers are no strangers to the dark the place.

Some are able to conquer their fear sooner than others. But every single one was afraid to hit publish the first time.

If you feel called to create, the feelings of the dark place will inevitably outweigh the fear.

A switch will be flipped. And once it’s flipped, there’s no going back.

Your creative energy is unleashed.

There’s no putting that beast back in the cage.

Don’t let fear stop you. It’s only real if you give it power.

Acknowledge that it’s there, and then walk past it.

You’ll never know what you’re capable of until you try.

TLDR: fuck around and find out

Play in decades. | me

the game is played in decades.

keep going.

3 psychology book recs

1. Blink by Malcolm Gladwell

   If you struggle to make decisions quickly, or at all, this is the book for you. Numerous studies are cited showing how good we are (most off the time) at making intuitive decisions without even thinking. Also, when our intuition gets us into trouble and leads us down the wrong path with things like implicit biases.

   I read this book in my Psych class in high school and have recently restarted it. A very very good book, easy to read, and super interesting. It will make you rethink how you approach making both big and small decisions in your life.

2. The 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene

   I’m only partly through this one, because it is a bit dense, but it is an interesting read nonetheless. Some people call this book evil, and I can see why. Basically each law of power he lays out is explained with historical examples of leaders or historical figures who have used the law to their benefit, or how the lack of use lead to their detriment.

   As far as if it’s evil or not, I think it’s helpful to know how you can be manipulated by other people who utilize these laws, even if you don’t employ all of them yourself. It’s better to know so you’re prepared to recognize manipulative tactics than not know and get taken advantage of.

   I recommend this book to anyone in the corporate world, or any other career where there are office politics at play, as well as anyone who does a lot of negotiations, whether you’re in sales, real estate, etc.

3. Captivate: The Science of Succeeding with People by Vanessa Van Edwards

   A great book for anyone who wants to get better at communicating with people. Even if you consider yourself a master communicator, you’ll find something in here helpful, I guarantee it. Vanessa calls herself “a recovering awkward person” but has taken her weakness and made it into her strength. I first saw her in this podcast with Tom Bilyeu:

   https://youtu.be/HMJNjLKgJpM?si=Heb3QnMB6Y_57MCT

   You’ll take an EQ test (Emotional Intelligence) at the beginning and then at the end after reading or listening to the book to see how much better you did.

   I listened the audiobook which comes with a PDF including the EQ test and various other diagrams/visuals.

   If you have a lot of networking events, you’ll get a full breakdown from where to stand at these events to make meet the most people and what to talk about to make a lasting impact.

   Highly recommend for anyone who is interviewing, networking, dating or just generally wants to get better at talking to people.

(More book recs can be found here.)